I know this is stupid. I know I shouldn't worry. But I do.
Let me give some background. When we first had children I really did debate the benefits vs risks of vaccination. I did hours and hours of reading on both sides of the issue. In the end, I decided I couldn't come up with a stong enough case NOT to vaccinate. So, we decided to go ahead with a slightly altered schedule to avoid too many vaccines in one visit.
I've always been uneasy about this subject. It really has nothing to do with mercury(especially because here where I live they were taking thimerisol out of vaccines at the time...my older son who's NT probably did recieve vaccinations with mercury preservative). I just never liked the idea of injecting all that stuff into my kids' bodies and I also worried about the difference between artificial and natural exposure.
Part of the reason we chose to vaccinate was because I have read enough about disease to know that the mortality/morbidity rates before vaccination were insanely high. I did the cost/risk analysis and made my choice.
Here's the deal. He's due for his boosters. Both DPTP-hib and MMR. And I'm freaking out. Even though because of delayed vax I KNOW his autism wasn't caused by this. He showed autistic signs way before he had a vaccination. I just am very anxious. With all the hubbub and discussion on the net about vaccinations I keep questioning my choices. I keep asking myself "did I make a mistake?" and "should I do this?".
We're planning to get them done. One next month and the other in march. It isn't that I'm trying to make a decision or anything. It's just that it's so damn scary!
Oh, and anyone who wants to comment and suggest my son is mercury damaged, when we were first diagnosed in my ignorance I did pay for testing (with two different companies and a DAN doctor) and all his levels are normal.